Term
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Definition
| feeling of affection and respect that we have for our friends |
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Term
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Definition
| sense of warmth and fondness towards that person |
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Term
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Definition
| admiration for another person apart from how he or she treats you and communicates with you |
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Term
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Definition
vast deeper intimacy, more tense emotional commitment, 3 components
1. intimacy: closeness union
2. caring: concern you have for your partner's welfare or desire
3. attachment: longing to be in your partner's presence as much as possible |
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Term
| Different types of romantic love: |
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Definition
| passionate love, companionate love, romantic friendship |
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Term
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Definition
state of intense emotional or physical longing for union
5 important facts of in experience and expression:
1. driven
2. feel
3. no gender or age differences exist
4. sexuality and sexual desire
5. negatively related to relationship duration |
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Term
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Definition
| intense form of liking defined by emotional investment and deeply intertwined lives , many long term relationships evolve companionate love |
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Term
| Greek names, romantic love |
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Definition
-storge: friendly lovers
-agape: forgiving lovers
-mania: obsessive lovers
-pragma: practical lovers
-ludus: game playing lovers
-eros: romantic lovers |
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Term
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Definition
| chosen interpersonal involvement forged through communication through which participants see bond as romantic |
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Term
| Five key elements to romantic love |
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Definition
1. perception
2. diversity
3. choice
4. tensions
5. communication |
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Term
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Definition
| competing impulses or tensions between ourselves and feelings toward others |
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Term
| three forms of relational dialects |
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Definition
openess vs protection: sharing personal info
autonomy vs connection: feeling so connected our identity dissolves
novelty vs predictability: our need for stability, excitement, and change |
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Term
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Definition
| being in anothers presence frequently exerts far more impact on romantic attraction than many other people think |
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Term
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Definition
| being more attracted to those you come in contact with more |
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Term
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Definition
| people feel more drawn to those that are more physically attractive |
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Term
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Definition
| forming long term relationships with those that we think are similar to ourselves in physical attractiveness |
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Term
| Birds of a feather effect |
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Definition
attract to those that are similar to ourselves
similarity: sharing parallel personalities, values, and likes dislikes |
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Term
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Definition
proposes that you will feel drawn to those you see as offering substantial benefits:
1. rewards
2. and knowing the rewards are superior to those you can get elsewhere |
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Term
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Definition
| balance of benefits and cost |
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Term
| 5 stages of coming together |
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Definition
1. initiating- sizing up someone u just met
2. experimenting-exchange info, small talk
3. intensifying- revealing previously withheld info
4. integrating- you and your partners personalities become one
5. Bonding: announcement to world of commitment to one another |
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Term
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Definition
1. differentiating: your beliefs, values start dominating your thoughts
2. circumscribing: begin to restrict quantity and quality of info you share
3. stagnating: no safe conversational topics, comm. slow
4. avoiding: no longer be around each other, distancing
5. terminating: discuss past, present, and future of relationship |
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Term
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Definition
| refers to the romantic efforts to keep relationship in desired condition |
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Term
| positivity maintenance strategies |
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Definition
| - most frequent tactic, comm cheerfully and using optimism , favors, gifts |
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Term
| openess:maintenance strategies |
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Definition
| create climate of security, and trust |
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Term
| assurance; maintenance strategies |
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Definition
| reaffirm commitment, messages that emphasize depth of intimacy, stress mutual commitment, and describe future |
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Term
| sharing activities: maintenance strategies |
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Definition
| sharing enjoyable activities |
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Term
| sharing tasksmaintenance strategies |
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Definition
| jointly sharing grunt work, day to day tasks |
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Term
| social networksmaintenance strategies |
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Definition
| friends and family approve |
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Term
| voice strategy confronting relationship crisis |
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Definition
| active, constructive approach, talks directly |
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Term
| loyalty strategyconfronting relationship crisis |
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Definition
| passive constructive approach, avoid directly comm, wait for feelings to get better |
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Term
| exit strategyconfronting relationship crisis |
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Definition
| dealing with relationship with thinking about leaving, threatening to leave, or leaving |
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Term
| neglect strategy confronting relationship crisis |
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Definition
| cut back on time, avoid discussion |
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Term
| Deciding whether to maintain, four criteria: |
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Definition
1. are you still in love?
2. is your relationship equitable?
3. do you and your partner share values and personality
4. do your fam and friends support |
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Term
| Dysfuntional relationship beliefs |
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Definition
1. all disagreement is destructive
2. mind reading is mandatory
3. incapable of change
4. every sexual encounter should be perfect
5. men and women are completely diff |
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Term
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Definition
protective reaction to a perceived threat to a valued relationship
Wedging: person using photos or messages to try and get inbetween someone in a romantic relationship |
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Term
| 3 strategies to best deal with jealousy |
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Definition
1. self reliance: aloowing yourself to feel jealous but not letting whatever sparked your jealousy to interrupt you
2. self holstering: combating jealous thoughts with positive affirmations about yourself
3. selective ignoring; pretending that what made you jealous isnt important |
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Term
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Definition
hurtful actions inflicted by one partner over the other, betrayal is intentional
relational devaluation: realization that our partners do not love and respect us as much as we thought they did |
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Term
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Definition
| most destructive, cheating, |
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Term
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Definition
| misleading your partner by intentionally withholding info or presenting false info |
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Term
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Definition
| escalates over time, often doesnt involve full blown physical violence until relationships are firmly est, potential abusers usually mask their jealousy, anger, control issues during early stages of relationship |
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Term
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Definition
| relationships last because partners learn that voicing concerns, and working together to solve crises they face. they survive because they know sex wont always be perfect, they wont always agree, and cant always read each other's minds. providing positive and openness, sharing time to talk, providing assurances feeds their love as fertilizer feeds plants. Betrayal can poison. |
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