Term
| Unfair fighting strategy; "vince, your jealousy is a sign that you've got some serious self-esteem issues. You must be really insecure" |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| We're often deceptive online because we see ourselves different (better) than others do. This is known as.. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| To be charismatic, you should exhibit this type of competency; you should know how to explain/teach/communicate your ideas to others |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| This is the topic we avoid most in relationships. The ____ of the relationship. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Greg knows his brother is gay, but no one else in the family knows. Greg doesn't think about their secret unless he talks to his brother or sees him when he goes home. This is known as the _____ ______. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| ____ or control, is central in the codependent relationship in the context of alcohol/substance abuse |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
What type of conflict is the following? "Don't tell me what to do" "You always take things so personally when we argue"
|
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Using feedback behaviors to give the false impression that one is listening |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| In same sex friendships, me do or engage in some ____ _____ together |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Providing these is key in reducing recidivism (relapse) |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Posting about alcohol/drugs or money can result in you being blocked on Facebook because these topics are considered ______ |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Conflict is not inherently bad or good; we could simply call it ______ |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| A combination of punishing and reinforcing behaviors that sustains addiction/substance abuse |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| If I drive you to Kroger because you need groceries and do not have a car, this is ____ support |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Your family goes to Cedar Point every 4th of July. When you suggest something else this year, everyone says "No way! We always go to Cedar Point for the 4th!" This is ____ ritualization. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Mary doesn't tell her mom that she didn't get into the major she wanted. She's afraid her friend will think she is dumb or inadequate. Why is Mary keeping this secret? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| These support messages help articulate feelings, help place feelings in context |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Ben wants to go out this weekend, and he asks his girlfriend if she is okay with that. She says 'whatever works' and Ben, assuming she approves, goes out. How is she being deceptive? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| One of the first horsemen; speaking from a place of superiority and showing a lack of respect |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| If I ask to borrow your sweatshirt and you say yes, and then I ask to borrow your car and you say yes, I may have used this persuasive strategy |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| When families have routines that have symbolic meaning they are called |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| One of the important components of stories is how we engage with one another when we tell that story. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| This is a word or words that are powerful and that most people respect, follow, and do not disagree with, which makes them particulary useful in trying to persuade or change others. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Post negative emotions on Facebook could annoy others, especially if they're strong or _____ |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Power is ______ (not everyone holds the same power from anyone else) |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Go to jail if you break the law. Loses effectiveness over time |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Involves intrinsic, extrinsic, spontaneous, calculated |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Police officers, teachers have this |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Role models have this ex. mom and katie |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Meaningful sayings about life |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Power because they know people |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the base of power:
Power because you have a lot of knowledge
ex. doctors |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| This type of reward power internal "gaining knowledge" "to feel good" "to accomplish" |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| This type of reward power "gifts" "gestures from others" |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| This type of reward power is random, unplanned |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| This type of reward power is expected |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| What kind of rewards are more impactful? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Do not offer _______ rewards for things that should be ________. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| _____ should be praised because ______ cannot be changed but often _____ can! |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
What are the two main principles of change?
|
|
Definition
1. People want consistency
"You say you want good grades but you never study"
2. People don't want to be forced
Tell underage people that the can't drink |
|
|
Term
| How do you combat God terms? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| When you tell someone they can't do something and they do it anyway. This is known as what? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Dr. Thompson, will ou let us out early today to watch March Madness games? If I say no, its likely because you did not address my WIIFM or provide benefits to me |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Manipulating messages to encourage change. 3 things! |
|
Definition
1. Must be new
2. Must be understandable
3. Must be relevant |
|
|
Term
|
Definition
1. Must provide a way out
2. Best when directed at those we care about
3. Must be relevant
4. Vivid ones work better |
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
If you get people in the habit of giving, you're more likely to do it again |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
Hey mom I need $100. No. I'll actually need $50. Okay |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
Best way to do is in a "sandwich" |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
Always start with problem. You have to build a need. then present a solution |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
Want to agree first so that we are closer and build a "team" like mentality |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
Should not tell people that you are trying to persuade them. You want them to feel as if they are acting on their own |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the message to encourage change:
"student emails I woulid like to discuss my exam" (no intent) |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Give your side, other side, why there's is wrong and yours is right
|
|
Definition
| Refutational two-sided messages |
|
|
Term
| It is percieved, others give it to you. It is objective. Hard to define; you know it when you see it. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify why we study charisma:
We like to be around/expose ourselves to those who are charismatic |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify why we study charisma:
We believe and really listen to charismatic people |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify why we study charisma:
We tend to remember charismatic people and our interactions better |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| What are the 4 dimensions of charisma? |
|
Definition
Credibility
Similarity
Attraction
Percieved Sensitivity |
|
|
Term
| A little mistake to show you're human makes you more likeable |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Charisma:
You should be good at things and know things |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Charisma:
Being able to manage your emotions |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Let people know about things and be honest before they even happen. Own up to your problems |
|
Definition
| "Hanging a lantern on your problems" |
|
|
Term
Charisma:
People have to find you worthy of telling things to |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Charisma:
You have to keep your big committments. Keeping small committments is more noticable |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Charisma:
You have to be nice to people but its going above and beyond to stand out. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| How do you act out good will? |
|
Definition
| By displaying "positive-display behaviors" or Postive discretionary |
|
|
Term
Charisma:
Shows you are human. We do not trust people who have nothing to lose |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Charisma:
The amount that you are outgoing or talk |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Charisma:
How well you talk; must be skillful |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Idenitify the level of similarity involved in charisma:
Growing up in same town, school, church, etc. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Idenitify the level of similarity involved in charisma:
We like to share values with others and see tings the same way |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Idenitify the level of similarity involved in charisma:
They are more knowledgable skilled in one area and that is what draws us to them |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the level of attraction involved in charisma:
we like people who are easy to work with |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the level of attraction involved in charisma:
the people that we want to hang out with |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the level of attraction involved in charisma:
How you dress, way you carry yourself, etc. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Percieved sensitivity charisma:What is the rebuttal tendency? |
|
Definition
| We have the tendency to countergargue with others when we listen. |
|
|
Term
| Percieved sensitivity charisma: Ask internally about what they are saying |
|
Definition
internal summaries, reformulate
|
|
|
Term
Support:
Getting rid of bad feelings "off our chest" |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Support:
People help us make sense of bad times |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Support:
Think about something and give it meaning. Something better to come along |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the level of social support: Person centered messages.
Criticize feelings, tell others how to act or feel |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the level of social support: Person centered messages.
distract attention from the situation, sympathize, explain situation |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Identify the level of social support: Person centered messages.
help articulate feeligns, help place feelings in broader context, elaborate on why those feelings exist |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Deliberate act of giving others info about ourselves that we believe to be true and think that they dont already know |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| What theory states that we share things in layers? Casual relationships tend to stay on the outer layers; intimate relationships tend to be more centered and can reach the core. |
|
Definition
| Social Penetration Theory |
|
|
Term
| Relationships are characterized by needs to both reveal and conceal info |
|
Definition
| Communication privacy management |
|
|
Term
| Why do people avoid topics and keep secrets? |
|
Definition
| relationship protection, individual protection/identity management, relationshio deescalation, information based motives |
|
|
Term
| It wont change, why bother? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Parents have a hard time telling kids theyre getting divorced because they worry on how the other will handle the info |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Consequences of keeping secrets:
try not to think about it, increase in thinking about it |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Consequences of keeping secrets:
you can think less over time, except for when you have contact with person |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Consequences of keeping secrets:
feelings of anxiety, so high people cant keep it in |
|
Definition
| Fever model of self disclosure |
|
|
Term
| Knowing and intentional transmission of info to create a false belief in the hearer |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Fail to convey info that changes the nature of the story |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| So much riding on a lie that it is harder to lie well; backfires |
|
Definition
| motivation impairment effect |
|
|
Term
Deceptive communication:
we try to project a positive image |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Conflict dimensions
about some info or a fact |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Conflict dimensions
how something is done |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Conflict dimensions
who the person is |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
Conflict dimensions
conflict about conflict |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| The tendancy to say or do things in one environment that one would not say or do in most other situations |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| The tendency for one partner to demand and the other to withdraw |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| The tendency to withold criticisms or complaints for fear of how the other partner will react |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Degree to which power is equal in relationships |
|
Definition
| Symmetrical/complementary |
|
|
Term
| Attempts to gain control or dominate v attempts that reflect acceptance or submission |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| When we attack someone where they are weak or their past character wasnt as strong |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| well if you were a good christian, a good boyfriend |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| "Tell your dad he dropped you off late" |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| We have a tendency to attack someone and then being busy so it cannot be discussed |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| In violent relationships; those who are obviously agressive |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| In violent relationships; those who are sneaky, unpredictable |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Talking broadly and then bringing up specifics |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| We make people feel crazy for their feelings; based on movie |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Wanting to be a good friend v good worker |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Who proposed the 6 stages of friendship? |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Everyday most frequent things that have meaning |
|
Definition
| Patterened family interactions |
|
|
Term
| Christmas play at mamaws, baking christmas cookies, etc. |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| Baptisms, birthdays, etc. |
|
Definition
| Family celebrations (society) |
|
|
Term
| Sometimes we have rituals that we do but we have no idea why |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| When something happens and ritual is upset |
|
Definition
|
|
Term
| When families adapt rituals for life experiences |
|
Definition
|
|
