Term
| Theories Of Couples Development |
|
Definition
| Although relationships vary significantly, there are some predictable stages that characterize intimate relationships. Couples interactions follow a developmental model, much like those that explain individual growth throughout the life course. stages are not linear. |
|
|
Term
|
Definition
- individuals are introduced, find they have common interests
- largely consists of conversations and dates, getting to know each other
- Focus is attachment
- filled with passion, nurturing, and selfless attention to the needs of others
- Differences are minimized and partners place few demands on each other
- romantic bond is the foundation that is critical to the health of the relationship
- In this first stage, members engage in symbiotic or mutualistic relationships—often putting the needs of others before their own
- Differentiation and learning to balance and support the separate needs of others happens in later stages but is not present initially. |
|
|
Term
|
Definition
- begin to see they have differences from their mates
- unique qualities result in unique needs that require an ongoing process of defining oneself and managing conflict, which threatens intimacy
- individuals focus on differences rather than similarities, which is the hallmark of the initial romantic stage
- Differentiation, or seeing oneself as distinct within a relationship, must be managed so that these new feelings do not result in breakups
- o “survive” this stage, individuals must acknowledge differences, learn to share power, forfeit fantasies of complete harmony, and accept partners without the need to change them |
|
|
Term
|
Definition
- redirection of personal attention, time, and activities away from partners and toward one’s self
- There is acceptance that partners are different from one
- the ultimate goal being intimacy that does not sacrifice separateness |
|
|
Term
|
Definition
- Individuals the reality that both partners are human, resulting in shortcomings in all relationships
- Partners acknowledge that they want to be with each other and that the good outweighs the bad |
|
|
Term
|
Definition
- Each partner is able to value and respect the separateness of the other
- The foundation of the relationship is no longer personal need, but the appreciation and love of the other and the support and respect for mutual growth
- this stage of couples development aims to create or nurture things that are enduring, often by creating positive change that benefits other people |
|
|
