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COMM3300 Test 2
chapters 7-9
57
Other
Undergraduate 4
03/27/2008

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Cards

Term
Interpersonal conflict
Definition
Expressed struggle that occurs when people cannot agree on a way to meet their needs or goals
Term
Interdependent
Definition
Dependent on each other; one person’s actions affect the other person.
Term
v     Myths About Conflict
Definition

Ø      Conflict is Always a Sign of a Poor Interpersonal Relationship

Ø      Conflict Can Always Be Avoided

Ø      Conflict Always Occurs Because of Misunderstandings

Ø      Conflict Can Always Be Resolved

Term
v     Types of Conflict
Definition

Pseudo conflict – triggered by a lack of understanding and miscommunication

 

Simple Conflict – stems from different ideas, definitions, perceptions, or goals

Term
For some cultures, conflict is expressive
Definition
focuses on issues about the quality of the relationship and managing interpersonal tension and hostility.
Term
For other cultures, conflict is instrumental
Definition

Ø      centers on achieving a particular goal or task and less on rational issues.

Term
Ego Conflict
Definition
Ø      Conflict in which the original issue is ignored as partners attack each other’s self esteem.
Term
Internet ego-conflict
Definition
§         flaming –sending an overly negative on-line message that personally attacks another person. 
Term
v     Conflict as a Process (5 stage)
Definition

Ø      Source: Prior Conditions Stage – The stage is set for conflict because of differences in the individuals’ actions or attitudes.

Ø      Beginning: Frustration Awareness – One individual becomes aware that the differences are problematic and becomes frustrated and angry.

Ø      Middle: Active Conflict – The individuals communicate with each other about the differences; the conflict becomes and expressed struggle.

Ø      End: Resolution – The individuals begin seeking ways to manage the conflict.

Ø      Aftermath: Follow Up – The individuals examine their own feelings and check with each other to monitor whether both are satisfied with resolution.

Term
Constructive Conflict
Definition

§         conflict that helps build new insights and establishes new patterns in a relationship.

Term
Benefits of interpersonal conflict
Definition

·        Focuses attention on problems that may have to be solved.

·        Clarifies what may need to be changed

·        Focuses attention on what is important to you and your partner.

·        Clarifies who you are and what your values are

·        Helps you learn more about your partner

·        Keeps relationships interesting

·        Strengthens relationships by increasing your confidence that you can manage agreements

Term
Destructive conflict
Definition
conflict that dismantles rather than strengthens relationships
Term
Conflict Management Styles
Definition

v     Conflict style is a consistent pattern or approach you use to manage disagreement with others.

Term

Five Classifications of conflict styles

  Avoidance

Definition

¨    conflict management style that involves backing off and trying to side-step conflict. (lose-lose approach).

 

 May use the demand-withdrawal pattern – one person makes a demand and the other person avoids the conflict by changing the subject or walking away.

Term
Five Classifications of conflict styles
Definition

¨      Compromise – Seeks the middle ground; will give up something to get something. (lose/win-win/lose approach)

 

¨      Collaboration – Views conflict as a problem to be solved; negotiates to achieve a positive solution for all involved in the conflict. (win-win approach)

Term

v     Conflict Management Skills

Definition

Ø      Manage Your Emotions

§         Be aware that you are becoming angry and emotionally volatile§     Seek to understand why you are angry and emotional§      Make a conscious decision about whether to express your anger.§     Select a mutually acceptable time and place to discuss the conflict§   Plan your message

§         Breathe§        Monitor nonverbal messages

§         Avoid personal attacks, name calling, and emotional overstatement

Avoid gunny-sacking – dredging up old problems and issues from the past to use against your partner.

Term

v     Conflict Management Skills

Definition

Ø      Manage Information

§         Clearly describe the conflict producing events

§         Own your statements by using descriptive I language

§         Use effective listening skills

§         Check your understanding of what others say and do

Ø      Be Emphatic

Ø      Manage Goals

§         Identify your goal and your partner’s goal

Identify where your goals and your partner’s goals overlap.

Term

v     Conflict Management Skills

Definition

Ø      Manage the Problem

§         Define the problem – determine the issue you disagree about

§         Analyze the problem – determine the causes, symptoms, effects, and obstacles

§         Determine the goals – Determine what you want. Determine what your partner wants. How do the goals overlap?

§         Generate many solutions – List many options, rather than debating one or two strategies for achieving the goal.

§         Select the best solution, and try it – Eliminate options that are not mutually agreeable. If possible, take the best idea(s) among those generated to reach an amicable resolution.

Term

v     Communicating with Prickly People

Definition

Ø      Go to the balcony – take time to cool off – time out

Ø      Step to the side – by just asking questions or listening

Ø      Change the frame – rather than rejecting the idea, try to see it in a different way.

Ø      Build a golden bridge – find an alternative that allows the other person his dignity

Ø      Make it hard to say no

Term

Five Classifications of conflict styles

 

Definition

¨      Accommodation – easily gives in to the demands of others; typically wants to be liked by others. (lose-win approach)

 

¨      Competition – Dominates the discussion and wants to accomplish the goal even at the expense of others. (win-lose approach)

Term
Definition
connection we establish when we communicate with another person
Term
Interpersonal relationship
Definition
v  Perception shared by two people of an ongoing connection that results in the development of relational expectations and varies in interpersonal intimacy.
Term
Shared Perception
Definition
Both individuals must share a perception that they are in an ongoing relationship
Term
Ongoing Connection
Definition
the interpersonal relationship is a process. The relationship is dynamic, constantly changing and evolving
Term
Relational Expectations
Definition
Ø   established after a relationship has developed over time – expectations specific to the relationship
Term
Interpersonal Intimacy
Definition
Ø   degree to which relationship partners mutually accept and confirm each other’s sense of self.
Term

v  Genesis of Interpersonal Relationships: Attraction

Relationship of circumstance
Definition
interpersonal relationship that develops because of life’s circumstances
Term
Relationship of choice
Definition
interpersonal relationship you choose to initiate, maintain, and perhaps, terminate
Term
Interpersonal attraction
Definition
Degree to which you want to form or maintain an interpersonal relationship
Term
Short term initial attraction
Definition
·       Degree to which you sense a potential for developing a relationship
Term
Long term maintenance attraction
Definition
·       Level of liking or positive feelings motivating us to maintain or escalate a relationship
Term
Predicted outcome value (POV)
Definition
·       Potential for a relationship to confirm our self-image compared to its potential costs
Term
Ø   Factors Leading to Short Term Initial Attraction
Definition
§       Proximity – Physical nearness to someone promotes communication and thus attraction§       Physical Appearance – Nonverbal cues that allow us to assess relationship potential (POV)
Term
Ø   Factors Leading to Both Short Term Initial Attraction and Long Term Maintenance Attraction
Definition
§        Credibility, Competence, and Intelligence – Personal qualities that, in and of themselves, evoke attraction§        Self Disclosure and Reciprocation of Liking – Openness; attraction toward a person who seems attracted to us§        Similarities – Comparable personalities, values, upbringing, personal experiences, attitudes, and interests§        Differences and Complementary Needs – Appreciation of diversity; matching needs

 

Term

Influence in Interpersonal Relationships: Power

 

Ø   Principles of Interpersonal Power
Definition
§       Power Exists in all interactions and relationships

Power primarily derives from an individual’s ability to meet another person’s needs within a given relationship

Term
Dependent relationship
Definition
·       one in which one partner has a greater need for the other to meet his or her needs
Term
Interdependent relationship
Definition

§       Both partners in an ongoing relationship have some degree of power

·       relationship in which each person has a similar amount of power over the other
Term
Principles of Interpersonal Power
Definition
§       Power is circumstantial§       Relational development involves a negotiation of each partner’s power
Term
Complementary relationships
Definition
§       one partner dominates and the other submits
Term
Symmetric relationship
Definition
§       both partners attempt to have the same level of power
Term
Competitive symmetric
Definition
·       both partners want power and control
Term
Submissive symmetric
Definition
·       neither partner wants power or control
Term
Parallel relationship
Definition
§       power that shifts back and forth between the partners
Term
Ø   Types of Power
Definition
ü     Legitimate power – power based on respect for the position a person holdsü     Referent power – power based on attraction to another person or his or her charismaü     Expert power – Power based on a person’s knowledge or experienceü     Reward power – power based on a person’s ability to satisfy our needsü     Coercive power – power based on the use of sanctions or punishment to influence others
Term
Ø   Negotiating Power in Interpersonal Relationships
Definition
§       Assess Needs and Their Fulfillment in Relationships§       Identify Need Based Conflicts and Tensions§       Directly Discuss Power Issues  
Term
§        Friendships at Different Stages in Life
Definition
·        Childhood friendships – self-focused and often superficial·        Adolescent friendships – peers influence social behavior. Boys often associate with others in groups, whereas girls develop deep friendships with a smaller circle of friends.·        Adult friendships – other relationships may change once a person chooses a lifelong mate.·        Elderly people and friendships – Old friends are valued, and friendship networks often shrink.
Term
Triangular Theory of Love
Definition
Theory that suggests that all loving relationships can be described according to three dimensions: intimacy, commitment, and passion
Term
§        Eros – sexual, erotic love based on the pursuit of physical beauty and pleasure.§        Ludis – Game-playing love based on the enjoyment of another.§        Storge – solid love found in friendships and family, based on trust and caring.
Definition
§        Mania – Obsessive love driven by mutual needs.§        Pragma – practical love based on mutual benefits.§        Agape – selfless love based on giving of yourself for others.

 

Term
Traditional couples
Definition
¨   married partners who are interdependent and who exhibit a lot of sharing and companionship.
Term
Independent couples
Definition
¨   married partners who exhibit sharing and companionship and are psychologically interdependent but allow each other individual space.
Term
Separate couples
Definition
married partners who support the notion of marriage and family, but stress the individual over the couple
Term
Mixed couples
Definition
married couple in which the husband and wife each adopt a different perspective (traditional, independent, separate) on the marriage.
Term
relationship
Definition
connection we establish when we communicate with another person
Term
Nonverbal Communication
Definition
Ø    Behavior other than written or spoken language that creates meaning for someone.§       All communication has both a content and relationship dimension§       Nonverbal communication is a primary source of relationship cues
Term
Listening
Definition
Ø    Process of selecting, attending to, creating meaning from, remembering, and responding to verbal and nonverbal messages.
Term
§       Selecting - Sorting through various sounds that compete for your attention.§       Attending - Focusing on a particular sound or message.§       Understanding – assigning meaning to sound.§       Remembering – recalling information§       Responding – Confirming your understanding of a message.
Definition
Ø    Hearing – Physiological process of decoding sounds.
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