Proxemity/Geographic Closeness 

One is significantly more likely to marry someone geographically close

1. If we know we will be physically close, we overlook the other's less desirable traits
2. Opportunities for communication are greater
3. Familiarity in itself may increase liking

Assortive Mating- mating based on sameness in 6 variables: age, ethnic background, race, religion, socioeconomic status, and education.

• Psychological characteristics show similarities: attitudes, opinions, worldviews, verbal abilities, degree of quarrelsomeness, ingenuousness, extroversion
• Similarity attracts in non-romantic relationships also: we like people who are like us and dislike people who are different.

Situations Modify Attraction

1. Perceived reciprocity of liking is whether you think the other also likes you (may be more important than attitude similarity in long-term relationships).
2. Changes in one's levels of self-esteem may affect who is liked.
3. Anziety or one's need to interact affects affiliation: people who share unpleasant experiences become more cohesive/desirable.
4. Isolation from the rewards of others affects who is desirable.  
   

Climate or Social-Psychological Context

1. Every message has a content and relationship dimension
2. Messages imply a certain relationship by their phasing
3. Confirming messages cause the receiver to value him/herself more
4. Disconfirming messages cause the receiver to value him/herself less.
5. Not all messages should be confirming.

Confirming Climates have messages that:

• Acknowledge the person
• Provide an authentic response to other 
• Focus on listening

Disconfirming Climates have messages characterized by:

• Impervious responses (ignoring)
• Interrupting responses (break in)
• Tangential responses (go off topic)
• Impersonal responses (disengagement)
• Disagreement focusing on person rather than ideas

Gibb's 6 categories of Supportive/Defensive Climates

• Supportive- Description, Problem Orientation, Spontaneity, Empathy, Equality, Provisionalism
• Defensive- Evaluation, Control, Strategy, Neutrality, Superiority, Certainty

Affection and Control are 2 primary relationship dimensions

1. Affection is the love/hate aspect
2. Control is the dominance/submission dimension
3. Behavior on the affection dimension tends to elicit similar responses (liking elicits liking)
4. Behavior on the control dimension tends to elicit complementary responses (submission elicits dominance)
5. Without agreement over control, it is continually renegotiated
6. Affection and control are independent dimensions

Knapp's Life Cycle Model- Coming Together

1. Initiating (show interest in communicating)
2. Experimenting (sample topics to learn about other)
3. Intensifying (beginning of intimacy/self-disclosure)
4. Integrating (persons consider themselves a unit)
5. Bonding (a formal ritualizing of relationship)

Knapp's Life Cycle Model- Coming Apart

1. Differentiating (focus shifts to differences over similarity)
2. Circumscribing (reducing frequency/intimacy of contact)
3. Stagnating (communication more like strangers)
4. Avoiding (physical or psychological separation)
5. Terminating (end of relationship)

Duck's 4 Relationship Dissolution Phases

1. Intraphysic (partner focusing internally on problems, begin to complain to others)
2. Dyadic (confrontation, discussion of issues)
3. Social (talk to others about breakup, seek support for decision)
4. Grave Dressing (look to others for justification of breakup, create account of relationship)

5 Maintenances Strategies in Romantic Relationships

1. Positivity
2. Openness
3. Assurance
4. Networks
5. Tasks

Stages in Family Development  

1. Families with preschool children focus on language acquisition
2. In families with school-age children, outside influences become important (Parental acceptance/rejection and control/autonomy is important)
3. Families with adolescent children face increased conflict
4. Stepfamilies face even more complexities

Divorce 

• Half of all occur within first 7 years
• Increasing in the over 50 age group, most often initiated by women
• Half of all marriages in the US are remarriages for at least one partner